WNelWeb & thoughts

Wednesday

2011-06-15T09:48:00.000-04:00

Yes. It is Wednesday and a beautiful day outside. I hope you can get out and enjoy it. pax, N

Blue

2011-04-19T13:28:00.000-04:00

Depression, when it hits, hits hard sometimes. This is one of those times. Hopefully, it will soon pass. Pax, N

To Twit? Or not to Twit. that is the question...

2011-02-27T10:34:00.000-05:00

Maybe I'm just old-fashioned, but I just don't get Twitter. Why would anyone on the planet be interested in my thoughts-of-the-moment? Even if I had time to post them, who would want to read them, really? I mean, I'm just not that interesting... Or am I? Thoughts? Pax,N.

New job

2011-02-03T18:37:00.000-05:00

New job is good to have, but Big Daddy is TIRED! Working OT all week and not used to it. Still, it's a JOB! Peace, N.

Guess what?

2010-09-22T09:59:00.000-04:00

Anybody still out there? Just in case there is someone, I am posting a shortie, but goodie, at least from my viewpoint. I am gainfully employed!!! I start training for my new job with Genworth Financial on 10/4/2010. I am both excited and more than a little nervous, but I am certain it is a good move. I'll have seven weeks of full time (8-5:30) training and then I'll be working part time at

Living with Depression: The Sneak Thief

2010-06-07T08:34:00.003-04:00

The thing about depression is that it can sneak up on you. You can be going along having a perfectly normal day and suddenly you realize that you're in a deep funk for no discernible reason. You haven't done anything wrong and no one has wronged you in any way. Just BAM! And you're having what Ernest Hemingway called a 'black-ass' day. What do you do? You see if you took your meds that

Dare you

2009-12-08T12:09:00.000-05:00

Dare to wonder as you did when you were a child.Dare to dream again as you did when you were younger.Dare to live rather than survive.I dare you. And me.Pax,N

Fall

2009-10-25T12:45:00.001-04:00

Fall is like late afternoon in the seasonal day. That is my least favorite part of the day, because all possibilities are rapidly becoming lost and although soon it will be early evening (when things are changing in my head for the better, sometimes) and then night, (and alright again), it isn't just yet. It is a time of remembrances for me and a time for wishing I'd got done at least a part of

9/11

2009-09-11T06:22:00.000-04:00

Never forget.

Good Day

2009-07-06T14:55:00.002-04:00

It started out as a pretty good day, for a Monday. The children were more or less happy and almost everybody got up on time. I drove the children to their respective destinations (daycare for the little one and day camp for the bigger one) and all was well with them.I came home and ate a sensible breakfast (although Hardee's sausage biscuits were calling out to me, I managed to resist that

Easter: Happy indeed.

2009-04-12T11:53:00.002-04:00

Thank-you God: for your Son and for my sons.Nothing much to add.Pax,Nelson

Thinking again

2009-04-01T12:17:00.002-04:00

You know, life really is not fair. I've been trying to get over that fact for most of my life, I think. I have often said it and believed it, but always in the back of my mind, hoped it wasn't true.I'm telling you people, it's true.I want to work again and support my family, but there is no work for me to do (none I'm qualified for anyway: if I was a nurse, I'd be in like Flynn).This is a

Ehh

2009-03-18T16:13:00.003-04:00

Got me a headache today. Gotta get some aspirin. Ya'll take care now, ya hear?Pax,Nelson

Lost?

2009-03-12T11:56:00.003-04:00

It's a halfway beautiful day. I might go out side.When I was a little boy, I am pretty sure I had dreams of what I wanted to be when I grew up. I think I wanted to be a scientist for a while and maybe even an astronaut. Nothing too unusual for a child to dream. I really can't remember specifically what I wanted to be way back then. I don't remember a lot about being that boy, either. Except

Today is another day

2009-03-08T15:38:00.003-04:00

It's a beautiful day outside and I think I'm going to go out and enjoy it. I recommend you do the same.Thoughts?Pax,Nelson

Morning

2009-02-09T13:28:00.003-05:00

I have an almost overwhelming urge to get stinking drunk today and stay that way. So far, I haven't given in to it. But it's only gone just half past noon, so the day is, as they say, young.It started off dark. I awoke to the unfamiliar sound of my wife's alarm clock going off. Unfamiliar because, usually, it sounds its wake-up alarm with the radio. So the current buzzing was unsettling. I

A non-post

2009-01-31T14:20:00.002-05:00

Well. Haven't been here in a while. Apologies to those who read this blog and those whose blogs I read. Much on my mind and much happening here at home. I will be back as soon as I get my stuff halfway straight. I sure need a job. God bless President Obama and all of you! As the song says, "Heaven help us all."Pax,Nelson

Here we go!

2009-01-20T12:50:00.000-05:00

God bless President Obama!

Rock, paper, scissors

2008-12-11T11:50:00.002-05:00

My friend Ludie over at Ludieman's Blog has begun a series of blogs regarding the three words above. Reading them has caused me to think. I'm not usually keen on thinking, preferring instead to get my opinions from television; especially detective shows and Science Fiction, but sometimes, in spite of myself, I think about things on my own. I have my friends (and you know who you are) to thank

Crystal

2008-11-26T07:58:00.002-05:00

Have you ever had one of those moments of absolutely perfect clarity? I'm talking about one of those moments when every single component combines and nothing could possibly improve it. It is as if a crystal is struck with a tiny silver hammer and a chime sounds and the whole world freezes in that instant. You will remember that chime and that instant for the rest of your life (may it be long and

Ha ha ha!

2008-10-23T18:33:00.004-04:00

OK, I crack myself up sometimes. I ordered some meds online this morning, because I was going to run out of certain ones fairly soon. No problem there; all was well.A little later in the day, while I was filling up my pill boxes I thought to myself,'If my anti-depressants don't get here in time, I'll be sad.'I had a nice long laugh.I am grateful for modern technology, the use of which allows me

Maybe

2008-10-02T14:27:00.005-04:00

I'm sleeping, on average, about four hours a night. Getting up with the baby for night time feedings is hard on a body. I do it almost all the time now, because L has to be alert for work and, since I don't work, I'm the most logical choice for night feedings. The thing is, I can't sleep during the day.

This parenting thing...

2008-09-16T12:55:00.004-04:00

One thing that the parenting books tell you about taking care of a sick baby is that you have to take care of yourself as well. That makes a lot of sense whe you read it and sounds like it is a simple enough thing to do, right?Wrong.Our little guy has had an earache since about Saturday. We've been to the doctor and are getting better (or I wouldn't be writing this right now, that is for sure!).

Heroes

2008-08-25T20:30:00.005-04:00

I've been putting off going over to my Daddy's house for about a week or so. The reason for this is because almost every time I go in there, I find myself shunted down memory lane. Sometimes, more often than not, that is a good trip and it's nice to take. Sometimes, it is not so nice.Almost always, I get sad and miss him, terribly, all over again.When we were small children, pretty much every

been not bloggin'

2008-08-18T23:03:00.004-04:00

'been not bloggin'not for a while,'been not bloggin'ain't had no style.been doin' other stuffbeen readin' other things.'been not bloggin'in a mighty long while.(Perhaps to the tune of "Been caught stealin" by Jane's Addiction. Perhaps not.)Haven't posted any words in a while. Well, that will soon change. I promise. The big question is, "Does anybody care?" aside from me, that is. I write here

A fickle mistress

2008-07-23T08:41:00.001-04:00

I wanted to get this down before I forget it again.Depression is a fickle mistress. Those of us in her thrall are well aware of this. One minute (or day or week or...) we're really down and there's no point in trying to do anything more than breathe and the next (with proper medication and the grace of God) we're able to maintain our emotional lives at a fairly decent level. When the fairly

Laughing

2008-07-18T21:34:00.002-04:00

This evening, Walter and I were goofing around after dinner and Samuel was watching us. Walter was laughing and I was laughing and Laura was laughing, too. All of a sudden a fourth laugher joined us! Little Samuel was laughing his little butt off at Walter and me! As far as any of us know, the baby busted out into a belly laugh for the very first time. I had forgotten how wonderful the first

Rumours Continued

2008-07-15T19:29:00.001-04:00

Well, I must have read good enough. I'll be playing the part of Welch, the policeman.

Rumours, continued.

2008-07-13T21:09:00.002-04:00

Auditions tonight were fun and I think I read pretty well. Going back again tomorrow night. Hopefully I'll find out tomorrow night if I got cast, but it may not be until later in the week. We shall see.Pax,N

Reaction

2008-07-10T13:44:00.005-04:00

I was reading a post over at my friend's blog (thanks for that, Musings!) and it got me to thinking. I don't normally like to think overly much because then I have to be aware of things on more than a reactionary level and sometimes that can be painful for me.A lovely by-product of depression. Anyway, the post was a poem, I think. I'm not sure what it's from, but it was credited. It deals

Rumours

2008-07-07T20:31:00.003-04:00

Auditioned for Rumours by Neil Simon. Was asked to come back next week, so we'll see...Pax,Nelson

Walking in Memphis

2008-07-07T11:30:00.000-04:00

I took a fast walk around my neighborhood this morning. It like to killed me. I started out, full of good intentions to walk a good deal further than that. I shortly realized I was not going to get as far as I'd hoped, so I reset my sights to a walk around the block. I got hot and the lack of sleep last night quickly began to catch up with me. I tried to out walk it and went a little faster.

2008_0614Walks0020c

2008-06-17T19:17:00.002-04:00

2008_0614Walks0020c, originally uploaded by wnelweb.We have a little cherry tree in our side yard. Every year, I go out and taste the cherries. This year there have been more and better tasting ones than ever before. Want one?

Testing, testing, one two three!

2008-06-13T10:31:00.002-04:00

Many times over the years, I've been told (by people whose intelligence and wisdom I have had every reason to trust and by total idiots and by many people in between) that God never gives us more than we can handle. For a long time (most of my adult life, actually), I believed that to be true. No longer. Now, I am pretty sure that God gives us just enough rope to hang ourselves. I think

Relief

2008-06-03T10:55:00.002-04:00

Quick note.I had my three month check in with my doctor today. I had feared I would have to go on insulin as the previous blood work showed my blood sugar had gone up. This time, it went down!I'm not talking about a daily check, mind you. There is a blood sugar test which measures how one is doing over the long haul. I had been steadily decreasing that level over the last couple of years, but

Baby fever day 5

2008-05-17T18:21:00.002-04:00

Laura spent last night in the hospital with Samuel and I stayed home and got some much needed sleep. Our son Walter stayed with some friends. This morning, Laura brought the baby home.And the baby is home now! Last diagnosis was bronchiolitis.Thank you God and the staff at VA Baptist Hospital, Pediatrics.I just learned from my friend at Musings that my friends Ludie and Sarah are now the proud

Baby fever day 4

2008-05-16T09:27:00.002-04:00

Day 4 in hospital. Samuel seems to be a little better, but not a lot. His fever is gone, Thank God, but his stopped up nose and whuffling and such have not. Laura spent the first night here and I've been here the last two. I'll probably be here tonight as well.The doctors tell us he will get well and that it's just a matter of time and waiting at this point. If he wasn't so little, they

Baby fever

2008-05-13T22:03:00.002-04:00

Well, hell.Baby has had a cold for the last few days and he's been pretty miserable. Snuffling and whuffling and trying to breathe with a head full of it has been his lot.Today, he spiked a fever of 103 .He is now in hospital for a 48 hour period of observation (when I left, his fever was around 100) accompanied by his weary and worried mother. I'm home with the elder son.Laura and I are both

Time

2008-05-12T21:22:00.002-04:00

And before you know it...Time is not what it once was. I know you will say it is my perception of time which has changed and not time itself, but this is untrue. There are days now which are made only of hours. There are days now which are made only of minutes. Still more days that are made of nights. And some of them are endless, sleepless, listless (You know, I've never head of something being

Win XP SP3 troubles?

2008-05-08T20:36:00.002-04:00

Not for me. I've updated two out of three machines and no problems I can see. I had a bit of trouble with one of them (my main PC), but I am fairly certain it was due to intermittent internet service interruptions from my provider. Once that cleared up, it was relatively smooth sailing. Each machine took about 30 minutes to do (using the update from Microsoft) and after one reboot apiece, all

Baby

2008-04-24T16:50:00.002-04:00

OK. So we've switched formulas again, this time to a soy-based product. Started last night and I believe there has been an improvement. I say that, because all of us slept more last night. Not all the way through mind you, but a good bit more than we have been. Today, he has been gassy, but not to the extent he had been. I think. It may be wishful thinking on my part, but I do believe it is

Baby

2008-04-23T06:13:00.002-04:00

coffeegood.Baby awake every hour last night; hungry with gas. Daddy awake ALL night. Both very tired. Mommy got to sleep some (a good thing) by being on the sofa downstairs. Big brother slept like a stone.Posts, if they appear at all, will be brief for a while.Thoughts?Pax,Nelson

BSG

2008-04-06T17:49:00.002-04:00

OK. BattleStar Gallactica may be the best show on TV and all. It may be worth fighting off much needed sleep to watch. It may decide the fate of our world as we know it... Wait. Too far.Frak.My take is this: They're ALL CYLONS!Thoughts?Pax,N.

New Hotness, Continued

2008-03-22T18:38:00.003-04:00

OK! Thursday 8PM exactly, our second son entered this world weighing 7 pounds 3 & 1/2 ounces and measuring 20 & 1/2 inches in length. Mother and baby are just fine and Daddy is moderately OK. Little brother is, by turns, excited and wary, but overall happy the baby is home.There's a reason they call it labor, folks. It's WORK! We checked into the hospital Wednesday morning and they started

New Hotness

2008-03-12T15:18:00.002-04:00

OK, then. Quick and dirty! Well maybe not so dirty. We're counting down the days now. Baby's coming on or about 3/19/08!I'll keep you posted! Posted: get it? POSTED! LOL! That's a joke son, a funny. I keep pitchin' and you keep missing.Thank-you Foghorn Leghorn. Now be quiet, I'm trying to type.Pax,Nelson

Light-hearted, but interesting

2008-03-06T18:09:00.003-05:00

This is only a small post and I'm not sure it counts. But then again, I don't care. My last post was pretty heavy. This here ain't that.Thanks Ludie, for the link to this silliness.You are The Wheel of FortuneGood fortune and happiness but sometimes a species ofintoxication with successThe Wheel of Fortune is all about big things, luck, change, fortune. Almost always good fortune. You are lucky

Series of introspections: Part one

2008-03-04T15:48:00.002-05:00

Once upon a time, I was a good and steady man. I was once gainfully employed. I worked in a job where I felt unappreciated and largely unnecessary. I worked very hard at this job and made some money at it, but not near what it was worth. My day would start at 4:30 or 5:00 when I would wake up and shower and dress and leave for work. I would arrive at around 6:00 or 6:30 and would work

Not yet

2008-03-02T10:29:00.002-05:00

Happy March folks!I haven't given it up! I will be posting something before too long. For now, I'm in a dry spell, but 'soon it's gonna rain. I can feel it.' I hope all of you who read my blog are well and safe and happy, not necessarily in that order...;) Can anyone tell me how to get smileys to work in here?Pax,Nelson

Lights, Camera, Action!

2008-02-03T11:04:00.000-05:00

Well, just camera really.Hi there. I'm hoping you can help me. Laura (my far better half) and I are considering upgrading from our camera (Fujifilm Finepics E550), with which we have been very happy, to something which has a little more bang for the buck. We're looking for something which has a faster recovery time (between click to click again) and a more accurate and sensitive auto-focus.

Meanwhile...

2008-01-28T09:50:00.000-05:00

I have not posted in quite a while. It isn't that I haven't had anything to say, it's that I haven't committed the time to say it or the mind to formulate the sentences. I prefer to think this has been a matter of choice on my part, but I'm not really sure. Much has happened in my life and things are not the same, but they feel that way. Maybe that is part of the reason for the long silence as

Cheese

2008-01-10T11:49:00.000-05:00

Can this little guy cheese or what?

Smokin'!

2007-12-26T16:56:00.000-05:00

I don't know if you smoke or not. If you don't, more power to you. If you do, I hope you'll be able to quit someday soon. I can tell you it is not easy, but it can be done. I've been smoke free since 1/1/2000. Prior to that, I had smoked for over 20 years.Nothing to do with today's post.What today's post is about is trying to make public gathering areas smoke-free. I'm not into government

Celebrity look-a-likes for moi

2007-12-14T00:24:00.000-05:00

OK. They came back with 8 women and 2 men. I could only pick eight people, so here we go.Any thoughts?Pax,Nelson

Knife

2007-11-27T00:31:00.001-05:00

In about 10 hours (11:45 am, my time), I go under the knife. Minor surgery (oxymoron if ever there was one) to fix my lower legs, left shoulder and possibly my left wrist. Not a big deal, but I'm a little nervous. I'm certain all will be well, but still, I've got a little bit of a hinky feeling...Ghah!Fuck it: wish me good luck if you read this prior to the event and speedy recover if it is

Gonna eat some turkey? I am!

2007-11-22T13:23:00.000-05:00

Happy Thanksgiving!Today, and every day, I am thankful for my family, health, liberty, freedom, our great country, love and you.By the way, child number two will also be a boy! Yay!Pax,Nelson

Young gods

2007-11-20T23:49:00.000-05:00

Willful, whimsical, free to imagine, free of care, free of responsibility, accountable to no one, unaware of obligation or loyalty or honor or the future, heedless of the past, one with the moment, perfectly beautiful, perfectly open, perfectly cruel, perfect in every good and bad way and unaware of every good and bad way, a young child is like a god, beyond human understanding or knowledge and

Today 11/18/2007

2007-11-18T23:59:00.000-05:00

Today I have accomplished as close to nothing as is possible for me. I had intended to paint the shower in the bathroom. Didn't do it. I had intended to go to the store and buy some needed groceries. Didn't do it. I had thought to mow/mulch the leaves in our yard. Didn't do it. I had intended to vacuum the living room rug, because it's nasty. Didn't do it. I had intended to do at least

Mortal after all

2007-11-12T17:06:00.000-05:00

I've got some surgery coming up real soon and I'm a little nervous about it. It is not really major surgery, but several minor ones rolled into one visit. With any luck, my lower legs will be fixed and I can enjoy walking again. Also, my left shoulder will be fixed and I can enjoy moving it again. If he (my surgeon) decides to do (repair the Carpal Tunnel Syndrome) my left wrist , I should be

Thoughts about the "N" word

2007-11-05T15:22:00.000-05:00

I was reading A Nigger Primer over on Transmyth and was planning a short response of general agreement with what was being said. Instead, I found myself writing a much longer response and decided it might make for a good posting of my own. I strongly suggest you read his original post as well.SO, with the permission of the Transmyth blog owner, here it is:Thank-you for this thoughtful,

Mean people suck

2007-10-28T14:55:00.000-04:00

I just read a reminder article from ZDNet news (picked up from from Reuters) about yet another malicious attack on the unsuspecting computer public. This one involves the Adobe Portable Document Format. You can read more about that here and here (and lots of other places, I'm sure), if you wish. You can get the latest version of Acrobat Reader® containing the update from Adobe.Dammit.Maybe I'm

A few thoughts for this week

2007-10-15T09:21:00.000-04:00

My son is outside playing in our yard. I'm trying to think of what to write for my blog and I'm not having much luck. We are waiting for my sister and her children to come over. She has come in town to deliver some boxes at out father's house, hopeful that I will fill them up with stuff. We've made no progress recently on closing the house. We should probably get to that. He has been dead for

Internet Explorer 7 ticks

2007-09-07T23:34:00.000-04:00

I'll tell you what: I get damn tired of this popping up in my IE7 browser window at random intervals. I infinitely prefer going to the home page of my choosing and when Microsoft 'hijacks' its own browser out from under me, it ticks me off. I mean, I don't hold it against them for advertising their stuff, but I've already got the damned thing. You'd think they'd give it a rest once a body

Labor Day 2007

2007-09-03T22:30:00.000-04:00

Sometimes, it's good to just start typing and see what happens. Today, I washed a few dishes, futzed around on the computer (a lot), Spent a little time with my son and an even smaller amount of time with my dear, very tolerant wife (who is pregnant with our second child). I wanted to spend more time with each, but I did not.I have no job. I have no desire for a job (not true). I have no

Quote of the day

2007-08-13T15:59:00.000-04:00

"Never moon a werewolf." two sources:Mike Binder quotesandtitle of a short story by Barbara Paul.No clue who was first or if either of these were the originator.

Bike

2007-08-10T11:37:00.001-04:00

I used to walk for exercise. Three times a week, I'd get out there and walk about 2 & 1/2 miles and count myself as doing the good thing.Unfortunately, it hurt my legs to do that. Hurt them a LOT.So I went to the doctor and it turns out I've got a relatively rare (for people in my demographic: i.e. middle-aged fat guys) condition called Chronic Exertional Compartment Syndrome. In a nutshell,

Mood control

2007-08-09T09:48:00.000-04:00

OK. I was in a really crappy mood this morning and then I saw this.I felt a little better and I laughed.I'm still in a crappy mood, but sometimes that's just the way it's going to be. Unfortunately, it's the way I'm wired. It helps me to know this. While knowing that this is just the way it's going to be sometimes does not make it all better by any means, it does help me cope and it allows me

Again?

2007-08-02T23:30:00.000-04:00

We arrived home from a mini vacation two weeks ago on a Sunday evening. The weather was nice and cool for a change and it had been a good weekend spent with some of L's family (her cousin H. and her family). We had a great time with them and everybody had enjoyed it. Even the children had gotten along once they became accustomed to each other. H. has two girls, eight and five. Our son W. is

Quote of the day

2007-07-30T09:14:00.000-04:00

Quote of the Day - James Brown - "You only live once."Ain't it the truth?Thoughts?

Jumble

2007-07-18T13:06:00.000-04:00

My morning was kind of messed up. This blog will also be kind of messed up and a little jumbled. Fair warning.My day started around 4:00 (which is kind of messed up already right there). More on that in a minute. I had arranged yesterday to drop my car off with the mechanic to have the Air Conditioner checked out as it was acting wonky. Cooled GREAT until it didn't and then the fan would blow,

Quote of the day

2007-07-10T06:41:00.000-04:00

I've noticed other folks do these little dealies from time to time, so I thought I'd don my 'go with the crowd' hat and do one myself."Pray for the dead and fight like hell for the living" Mother JonesTough lady. Admirable. Check her out.Thoughts?

Blaze!

2007-07-03T16:53:00.000-04:00

I am now the proud owner of a Logitech Marble Mouse. I know: sounds like a Disney toy, but it's not! What it is, is a trackball. I've never used one before (always been a Mouse-man) and it is taking some getting used to, but I think I may become a convert.The cursor moves over the screen with grace and speed unseen prior to installation and my wrist isn't hurting anymore (although, in fairness

He did what?!

2007-07-03T08:25:00.000-04:00

Patience is a relative term, especially when it comes to relatives. What works for some, may not be enough for others.For the longest kind of time, I felt it was my duty to exhibit patience when dealing with my father. Although we began to get along better in his latter years, he always knew how to push my buttons. We clashed on a very basic level and I'm still not sure why. We had a rocky

123

2007-06-26T23:11:00.000-04:00

I was involved in a chat not long ago with my blogging mentor, Ro the wise and mighty, not too long ago (this morning actually) and we were discussing the nature and qualities of LOVE.The less romantically inclined of you may wish to turn elsewhere at this point. May I suggest a nice porno spot? Never mind, I'm sure you can find one yourself.) ;-) We were discussing in particular the differences

What was that?

2007-06-18T21:09:00.000-04:00

OK.So my therapist has suggested to me a couple of times that it might be OK to skip a session. Should I be concerned? No. It is a good thing.I've got the Wireless PCI adapters for my desktops. I may put one of them in tonight. I should have both completed by tomorrow night and then maybe all three machines will be able to talk to each other. My secondary desktop has been cut off from the

Where's my computer?

2007-06-14T22:17:00.000-04:00

My better half decided that more space was needed for her craft-works. OK.My (our) computers have to be moved. OK.I moved the main one today and fortunately, I like the new location. Unfortunately, the other one won't fit in the new location. So it looks as though I've got to find a new place for the secondary PC. And I'm going to have to install wireless cards to each PC, so they can talk to

Wednesday the 13th

2007-06-13T22:43:00.000-04:00

Lord help me, Friday the 13th has come on Wednesday! Woke this morning and everything went right. My love was happy and our son was happy and cooperative with nary a whine.Now, it's this evening and I've screwed the pooch pretty much completely. That's right: had a fight with my Love. It was a not-so-stupid fight over feelings and (my) lack of perception. I had created a painful and upsetting

Death Penalty

2007-06-11T21:10:00.000-04:00

Whether you're fer it or agin it, once the topic of the Death Penalty is raised, there's pretty much always going to be a discussion.I read an AP article online in the MSNBC News today reporting that new studies support the notion that the death penalty actually is a deterrent to would-be murderers. One of the folks who conducted the research is actually a DP opponent, but he swears the research